...a way of seeing beyond inner and outer.

Friday, September 10, 2010

I am. A corn pone.

We went on a cruise last week for our 10th wedding anniversary. It was so much fun. Romantic, not so much, but I've pretty much said good-bye to that for awhile (that's another blog).
Anywho. It was nice, fun, enjoyable, relaxing.

But. My absolute favorite day was the most un-me day!

Let me explica by giving a little background on the days that preceded this.

The week before the cruise, all three of my children AND my hubby got a stomach flu, a cold, AND my DD had an ear and throat infection. I was chugging emergen-c's like there was no tomorrow. I had little sleep, was eating comfort cinnamon toast (instead of DIETING for the swimsuit I would be wearing), and basically staring at the cruise line web page when things got overwhelming.

THEN on the cruise, my DD decides that I am the only one that can hold her AND she doesn't like to eat in the dining room.

On our first "shore day" as we are eating breakfast YDS decides he absolutely CANNOT eat the turkey breakfast sausage and so proceeds to....drum roll, please..yes! THROW UP all over himself, the table, me, and the bench. Nice.

Sooo, imagine this: the breakfast area is on one end of the ship, completely at the back. And our room is, you guessed it, at the complete other end.

Well, apparently absolutely everyone is eating breakfast in the dining room at this point. So I must make the loooooong walk across the ship with YDS's breakfast all over us, everyone watching and trying to avert their eyes. Sick boy walkin'. *SIGH*

ANYWAY, this is pretty much how the trip is going. A few low points, some high, and mostly middle points. I was frazzled when I got on, relaxing once on the cruise, but still a bit tired and dealing with bodily fluids and clinginess. Until the last full day we had.

DH and YDC were in the cabin napping. I took my ODS to the pool.

While there I noticed these adorable alcoholic drinks in tacky souvenir cups. I bought one. I couldn't resist! It was mostly fruit juice (mango-y) with a bit of rum. I am not of fan of rum, and really don't like mango (I'd rather not talk about it, too traumatic).

BUT. I don't know why...it was delish! The bartender had even put a little umbrella with a cherry on it just for ME (that truly made me light up even more! How pathetic!).

So what next, what next?

Well, I am in my swimsuit. In public. And not wearing a mumu. Soooo, how's about...the HOT TUB? Yeah, baybee!

As chance would have it, there was an ice carving show right next to me, followed by a HAIRY CHEST CONTEST! WOOOO-HOOOO! I was cheering for all of them! Especially the ones from Texas, bay-bee! Sippin' my tacky drink, soakin' in the hot tub...and, wha? What's that? What was I doing? TALKING TO STRANGERS! Yes! I talked to people I didn't know!

What happened to me??? I was THAT cruiser lady who walks around in her swimsuit letting things that shouldn't be seen get sawed! Slurpin' those nasty looking drinks waaaay too early in the day...and those moronic contests? What. Ever.
And then? Then. Cha-yeah! I got into a CROWDED pool and HUNG OUT!

What in H-E-Double hockey sticks was happening to me??

I still don't know, but me likey. Me likey lots!

DH- Dear Hubby
ODS/C - Older Dear Son/Child
YDS/C - Younger Dear Son/Child/Children
DD - Dear Daughter


  1. I'm thinking what happened is your mom self finally got on the boat with your fun-is-going-to-happen-get-out-of-my-way-and-no-one-gets-stabbed-in-the-eye-with-a paper-umbrella self.. It's the Ben Franklin syndrome. "Beer" or in your case, circa 1950's tiki type adult beverages with the requisite oh so charming paper umbrellas and macerated stone fruits " is proof that God wanted man" or in your case, super woman "to be happy." or in your case, to be in the hot tub...

  2. btw, I love the mom self and that other woman.. you know, the woot woot hairy chest contest woman..

  3. ...the corn pone? I just laugh at her. She's weird. Funny, but weird.

  4. Well, if you don't laugh, someone else will!


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