...a way of seeing beyond inner and outer.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Waiting to explode

The other day when I began to see that life would, in the approaching days, begin to edge back from chaotic careening to clear, I thought back to times when I'd be so happy to be "done" with being annoyed, frustrated and exhausted that I would become annoying, frustrating and exhausting.  I have been told lithium might not be a bad idea and considered it until I found out about its effect on the liver.  The swing is pretty dramatic, but I need my liver for other things, like champagne and the crap that kills birds when it burns off non-stick pans.
Ever see a room full of screaming 7 year olds in close proximity to presents, cake, balloons and lit candles  ?  That's joy.  It's also hysteria, a good way to burn down a house and why balloons aren't filled with hydrogen any more.
Joy is wild.  It's complete abandonment of restraints because it's all consuming.  It's also not a perpetually pragmatic way to live ones life because joy is dangerously close to mania and it doesn't get the laundry done.    There are many schools of thought that suggest you really shouldn't experience it until you're very evolved or you'll basically explode.   I don't care. I want to get to it so I can get passed it.
om?   um.....    
 Right passed joy is bliss and the thing about bliss, is you get it all.... love and peace and joy and faith etc.  all of it... in equal measure.  There's no one burning down a house and the laundry becomes a spiritual experience.     
At this point, laundry is not at all spiritual. It's one of the many things that are standing between me and wine country.

1 comment:

  1. Hmm...I posted about laundry today, too.
    I always thought of joy and bliss as cousins. Now that you mention it, bliss is a calmer state -- of arrival. Great post!

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